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Time will never heal the wounds, but healing takes time
December 05, 2008

Time will never heal the wounds, but healing takes time

We often hear an expression telling us "let the time heals all wounds", but what is really happening ? Time will always pass, and sometimes it passes so quickly, but in fact time can never heal the wound. Healing process is actually an active process and not a passive process.


For example when we are wounded but we did not do anything to heal that wound, maybe we did not sterilize the wound then give it some medicine and take a good care of it, it will become worse, or even start to decay. When this happen, its going to take more time and efforts to heal the wound , and there is a possibiliti of an infection. But in the end, it will be cured, and definitely will leave a scar.

When our feelings, souls or minds are wounded, it feels like being ripped, very painfully. It felt worse than when our body being wounded. That wound might healed, but who know what lies beneath ? Will we be totally healed, or we just buried our angers, our fears, hate and doubts within ourselves temporarily ?

Actually, healing and medicating are two different concepts. Healing is more like a spiritual thought, while medicating is related to the medical actions. Healing is an active process, it won't be happen by itself. We have to be involved actively within the process of healing. Healing is a gift that we give to ourselves when we decided to stay open to anything that can destroy us.


On the pain management method, which is often practiced to patients who are being injured, all patients were taught not to fight the pain, instead of to be more relax and let the pain exists as the natural effect of wounds. The basic of this method is if we fight the pain, it will become worse. If only we could be more calm, and take some deep breath continuously to make our bodies more relax and let go off the pain, the pain will find its own place and move freely, and finally the pain will vanish by itself faster.

The pain exists to let us know that there is something wrong is happening inside our bodies. It also warn us the possibility of danger. Our best friend used to say sometimes the pain is good for us, it reminds us that we are still alive. It might be true.

It also works for our emotional, our spiritual, our mental and our physical wounds. When the pain talks to us, we should listen to it. What we have to do is actually just paying attentions to that pain, so when it comes, we are ready for any possibilities, we remember how to take a deep breath and be more relax. We don’t want to fight that pain, but we want to learn something from it.

Time will never heals the wounds, but healing takes time. Give yourself a time as a gift, to be more complete. If we could open ourselves for pain, we also could open ourselves for loss. We open our heart widely, and we will have a bigger heart to accept more beautiful opportunities which were offered by life.

We can get what we have lost if we could close our sore minds and our wounded heart. But we can only get what we can lose in the future if we did not give ourselves time to heal the wounds. As Carly Simon used to say, "There are more spaces in a wounded heart."

Inspired by Healing Through the Shadow of Loss, by Deborah Morris Coryell

Aura 30/TH.IX/Minggu 2


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